Always running late? Be realistic, and stop gambling with time.

Clients often bring up their struggles with running late, and this can be evident in chronic lateness to appointments. Admittedly, I’m often pushing it as well. This is common in adults with ADHD, and those who are otherwise disorganized. These people often don’t prepare, they misplace important items, or they misjudge how much time theyContinue reading “Always running late? Be realistic, and stop gambling with time.”

11 reasons why a friend is not a therapist

Most of us have heard things like, “I don’t need a therapist- that’s what friends are for”, or “Why would I pay someone so I can talk about my problems? I have friends”. You may have said these things yourself. Yes, friends (or family) can be good sources of support, and it’s great we don’tContinue reading “11 reasons why a friend is not a therapist”

Upset over things you can’t control? Maybe it’s unrealistic expectations.

As a psychologist, I often see that what often drives many emotions, like frustration, anger, sadness, or disappointment is unrealistic expectations. When we have something we expect, and this is not what happens, we are likely to feel a certain way, which then leads us to react accordingly. We may lash out, complain, speak negatively,Continue reading “Upset over things you can’t control? Maybe it’s unrealistic expectations.”

When you might let go of family or friends

One area I have come to specialize in as a psychologist is relationships. Love relationships, family relationships, and friendships can become problematic or a source of stress for all of us, but more and more I hear from people who repeatedly give in their relationships, but they get very little back. And many relationships areContinue reading “When you might let go of family or friends”

6 Ways to “Have Time”

“I don’t have time to exercise…eat healthy…pack my lunch for work…get my hair or nails done…buy groceries…save money…read…watch TV or movies…see friends…write…draw…”, and so on. These days it is tough to have time to do anything, especially if you work, have a family, have kids involved in activities, etc. With so many responsibilities, sometimes competingContinue reading “6 Ways to “Have Time””

Midlife Crisis? …or, Midlife Awakening?

Song: “Courage to Grow” from album of the same title by Rebelution (2007); Video with lyrics: Grace Berdan (Youtube, 2012)… (I added a video this time because I like the band, and I also thought the song really fit this post) As a psychologist and someone in “midlife”, I hear people talk about midlife crises allContinue reading “Midlife Crisis? …or, Midlife Awakening?”

Repost: 8 (9) Tips to Enjoy the Holidays More

Whatever you celebrate or whether you celebrate, this time of year may be filled with family gatherings, get-togethers with friends, and being a bit busier.  Many of us enjoy the holidays, yet people report a significant amount of stress surrounding them.  Whether it’s trying to do too much, financial concerns about gift buying or takingContinue reading “Repost: 8 (9) Tips to Enjoy the Holidays More”

Think quitting drinking or AA is the only way? Think again.

I recognize that this post may seem controversial to some people, but hear me out. I want  to challenge “conventional wisdom” here- because it’s something I’ve always had a need to do, and because I’m a psychologist and I spend every day helping people think differently or to find out-of-the-box solutions to their problems. ForContinue reading “Think quitting drinking or AA is the only way? Think again.”

Adjustment Isn’t Always Easy

We will all have to make many adjustments in life- to new things (schools, houses, jobs, towns); to situations we didn’t expect (losing a loved one or them becoming sick, a divorce, loss of a job); or to common life transitions (marriage, becoming a parent, children leaving the house, retirement). Some of these are veryContinue reading “Adjustment Isn’t Always Easy”